Friday, 3 July 2015

Posted by Ordinarily Quirky On 14:41
How To Survive A First Date

How to greet your date

This is a major stress zone because you think in your head: "Do I shake their hand, do I hug them, do I kiss them on the cheek, too many options!!!!" *faints* Okay, first we breathe, and think about it. When you greet someone new like a person in college, or a family member you haven't seen in ages, a customer in work, all of these greetings are different BUT the greetings all happen naturally. You don't stress about how to greet a family member, a customer in your work place or a friend of a friend usually because they're casual greetings. 

So why stress over how to greet your date? 
Just because this date could be the first of many wonderful dates and possibly a relationship and children and grandchildren and where to live, will I change my job to move nearer to him? 


Don't do that to yourself. Don't pre-determine your future based on this one encounter. Focus on the date itself, how you're looking forward to a few drinks, some food or the film you're going to see. Avoid over thinking about more dates before you even go on your first date. Easier said than done, but that's the issue you have to grasp otherwise your mind will be very flustered before you even go anywhere!

Topics of conversation

I'll admit, I have Googled this before going on a first online date, and anyone who knows me knows I can talk! But I did it because of the risk of that awkward silence. The dreaded awkward silence! *shivers* Some silence is okay, but you don't want to end up at the stage where you realise you've both spent more time looking around and thinking of what to say than actually talking to each other. Talk about whatever comes to mind, such as:

Something you saw on the television/Facebook/the news
A new film you've seen
A recent trip you took
The weather (simple, but effective, especially if you elaborate and discuss extreme weather over the years such as being snowed in, a current hurricane, etc. if you like that sort of stuff, like me!)
Funny things that happened to you in college/work/with your friends/family

Topics to avoid

How you started waxing and wish you didn't and begin showing them your red and bumpy skin, eww.

Why you're single (unless it's a general answer "because I needed a change, things didn't work out" and then change the topic.) This is because you shouldn't end up talking about exs! The reason being, if it ended badly, you'll naturally end up giving out and not realise it. Even by making a joke about how you don't date dickheads comes across as a little... "Em, alright then, well you seem nice..." *awkward silence* kind of thing. So don't even go there and leave that for another time.

Controversial topics where opinions could clash and cause an arguement. (Abortion, gay marriage, whether 50 Shades Of Grey is a good film or not, etc.) And lastly...

The usual creepy stuff: How many children you want to have with or without your date in mind, your favourite time of day to clip your toenails, how Hotlips crisps always get stuck in your teeth which you then buy a packet and show them what you mean, the way you sleep with your pet in the bed at night but you wish it was your date, etc. 

Ending the date (to kiss or not to kiss)

 The most awkward part of the date that could essentially determine whether there is a second one or not. From my experience, usually a date that went well ends with a kiss, but not always. Sometimes people are shy, are bricking it about kissing the person and end up not doing it or they feel the pressure and back out. Whatever the reason, to kiss or not to kiss always depends on how the date went. Regardless of gender, if you like the person, go for it! But don't force yourself to or feel that you have to. If you want to wait and see if they will kiss you, then do it. Just go from your instincts. 

Never feel you have to end a good date with a kiss. If you're not comfortable, say no firmly. Don't allow them just because you're worried they won't like you afterwards if you don't kiss them. If they really like you, they'd respect your decision not wanting to kiss and understand you're not ready yet. If they have a problem, be thankful! You just realised your date is actually a dickhead and you don't have to waste any more time on them! Nice one! :)

So those are the main areas that I have stressed over when it came to a first date! Greeeeat fun! But the main thing to take from it is:

Keep it simple
Focus on having fun

You never know, you could be looking back on it in years to come!

:) <3



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